I’m sure some of my followers and friends on Twitter and Facebook are all wondering what’s been going on since last night. For those of you out of the loop: I made a couple of discoveries last night, one of which left me so shocked that I still haven’t quite recovered. I’d like to preface this story by saying two things: (1) I don’t often write about my own personal life, which may make this difficult, and (2) this story involves a rather touchy subject regarding my upbringing, which I don’t usually talk to people about. Hopefully, this post can act as a sort of therapy session.
Last night, I was testing out my new Twitter client, Tweetie, for my iPod Touch, and one of the features of the program is the ability to see who else is twittering in your geographic area. Since I was in my hometown, I thought it might be interesting to see if there were any local Twitter users I knew in real life. As luck would have it, I found a couple of old classmates as well as my Creative Writing professor from Community College. However, I wasn’t expecting to find my father among this group of people.
Now, I’ve been raised my entire life by my mom, and I have absolutely no relationship with my father. In fact, I’ve never even met the man. Until I googled him a few years ago, all he was to me was a name on the monthly child support check. Imagine my reaction to not only seeing a picture of him, but receiving a small look at his thoughts day-to-day. It was kind of amusing really, being able to humanize the man I grew up dispising. Perhaps that’s too strong a word, but it’s enough to say that my father is not a man I ever sought to meet. It was enough for me to know that he never took an interest in my existence. So I regarded any curiousity as simply that, and not a deeper desire to meet the man.
But as I was looking over his tweets, I noticed that he had several posts like this:
Buying lunch for my daughter.
Daughter’s laptop had nothing wrong with it.
Had to run help my daughter with her SUV.
I realized that I wasn’t just learning about my father, I was learning about a sibling I never knew existed! It was the middle of the night, and I was freaking out. I couldn’t sleep. I was angry and sad and excited and a multitude of different emotions all at once. And if that weren’t enough, as I was rereading the things he had written about her, I made another discovery:
Fixing my one daughter’s PC. I don’t have this problem with the other daughter. She has a MAC.
I didn’t just have one little sister (I’m assuming they’re younger than me), I had two! It feels rather surreal saying that. My whole life, I’ve been the youngest with two older half-sisters, and now I come to find out that I more than likely have two younger half-sisters. Suddenly, I’m now the oldest, youngest, and middle child depending on how you look at things.
I’m still not quite sure how I’m going to proceed with all this new information, but I’d like to try and have a relationship with these siblings if possible. If I meet no other resolutions for 2009, I’d like to meet my two younger sisters and try to foster a relationship. I feel like I have a right to know them. If that means finally meeting my father, well… so be it.